My daughter’s wedding: What’s a mother of the bride to do?


Red Shoes

Photo Credit: Blair Gable

Red shoes and dogs.

My daughter wanted to wear red shoes with her beautiful cream coloured wedding dress. My future son-in-law wanted their dog to be the ring bearer.

I wanted neither. What’s a mother of the bride to do?

I did my best. Despite spending the better part of an afternoon in shoe stores in Montreal, there were no red open toed high heeled shoes my daughter was looking for. But we did see many lovely cream coloured shoes that I adored. I was beginning to breathe a sigh of relief when we decided to try one last store.   And there they were—exactly what she wanted.

She left that store a happy bride to be. I was… resigned. Although I was pleased with myself; I hadn’t said a negative word about red shoes.

The dog was another matter. I had visions of it jumping on my daughter’s dress, barking through the ceremony, or worse, peeing just as the young couple were saying their vows.

The last thing I wanted to do was alienate my wonderful son-in-law. He loves the dog and sees her as part of the family. I had a brief chat with my daughter but it was clear that the dog was as important to the wedding ceremony as the officiant.

It’s hard to bite your tongue while planning a wedding. Despite the fact that most young adults live together before they get married, the prospect of a wedding looms large in the consciousness of parents. Apart from love, the wedding symbolizes stability and hope and the possibility of grandchildren.

But with that day comes enormous pressure. Everyone wants the day to be perfect and perfection is in the eye of the beholder.

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