Is helping with your kids’ mortgage really helping your kids?

Even a small house can cost a fortune

Even a small house can cost a fortune

My general rule of thumb for parenting is to let children, be they five or 35, do as much as possible for themselves. It makes them feel strong and competent and that goes a long way to making them feel happy.

While many parents are quick to help their adult children buy a house, my husband and I have not helped finance our children’s mortgages.  I am happy with our arrangement as it leaves us with much less complicated relationships.

Our children don’t feel financially beholden to us and because we have no propriety interest in their property, we’re more likely to refrain from giving unwanted advice.  In addition, our children have no sense of entitlement to our other assets.  I have seen this happen when parents help with mortgages and understandably, the parents are resentful. Read More

Happy Mother’s Day!

Happy Mother’s Day everyone!  I am thankful I have lots to be happy about and here is why:

1. My heart sings each time I see one of my three kids.

2. I have two wonderful sons-in-law, who also make my heart sing.

3. All three kids and kids-in-law live in the same city I do.

4. All five are thoughtful and concerned citizens of Canada and the world.

5.  They have a father/ father-in-law who cares about their well-being.

6. I see them regularly, but we don’t sit in each others’ pockets.

7. They still come to me for advice, even if they don’t take it.

8. All of them are the longest blooming flowers I have ever seen.  Watching them change and grow is like magic before my very eyes.

9.  They keep teaching me about the world.

10.  They keep teaching me about myself, especially how much I can love.

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Advice for young job hunters

Go to the Globe and Mail homepage

Today’s Globe and Mail has an excellent insert for Gen Y.  You may be interested in discreetly leaving it on the kitchen table for your 20 something young adult or (not so discreetly) forwarding them the links to the online version.

Canada’s Top Employers for Young People lists 90 companies that share a commitment to helping young people transition into the working world.

Yesterday, Victoria Hoffman wrote about job hunting and the need for young people to network. Another useful resource for your young person.

Our kids may not take our advice, but they may absorb something they read.  Good luck to you and to them!  Read More